What a day…

     Oh how I wish that I could just blog all day long! I have so much that I would love to just jot down. Darn work, it gets in the way. Then, at the end of the day, I can write about it, but it is not nearly as spontaneous. I have got to find a way to teleport my thoughts to my blog! 🙂

     So… This morning, I am minding my own business. I mean I am just trying to cuddle with the kids and then get ready for work when out of the blue I get a text from Hollywood. Um, yeah… That is the last person that I would have expected to hear from. It has been 7 days. Seriously? Out of the blue I get a text that says “I’m sorry I didn’t send any ‘wish you were here’ picts : – (“… Um hello Hollywood that is probably because you didn’t wish I was there and you weren’t thinking about me. Hahaha… Really, I am okay with that, just be honest. The truth is more like “travel is over and I have to come home to an empty place and I am going to be lonely, do you think you could be there?”…That would have been the honest thing to say because it is not like there was anything going on anyway…. I do have to admit though that the texts that followed had me literally laughing out loud. Like I had to put the hair dryer down kind of laughing. He was on a roll. Clearly 7 am is his peak time of the day because he could have had his own comedy show this morning. Anyway, Hollywood really is a persistent man. I finally acquiesced to his consistent requests throughout the day and spent a small amount of time with him tonight. Although a very delicious looking man, he wasn’t nearly as funny in person tonight as he was via text this morning. :-/ … I did find him to be interesting though. I find a man who does not have a TV in his home intriguing. To add to the complication of this man, he has books on a bookshelf and we were able to talk about them, so he isn’t just putting them there for show. His place was simple which is a complete contradiction to his look (I call him Hollywood for a reason). I would have expected to see a far different picture walking into his place. It appears that he may have many sides to him. I am not sure if we will ever go beyond the conversations of today/tonight. I am not sure there is anything there to build on, but like everything else, I guess time will tell.

     Actually, now that I think about it, Comfortable jeans, nameless and Hollywood all text me this morning. Hollywood is the only one that maintained a text conversation and Nameless is the one that I was most excited to hear from. He is currently at the top of my list. He even won points today bringing me a drink to work in the middle of the day. It was nice to see him and have a moment to chat with him. I am really looking forward to an evening with him later this week. It will be nice get to know him more. He seems reliable and steady. I like that. 

     Comfortable jeans is really beginning to concern me. I have been completely upfront. He knows that I am dating. He knows that I do not see a future between him and I. He knows where I am at. I have been careful to be honest. I don’t ever want to be accused of leading someone on. He just isn’t really hearing what I am saying. I guess I am going to have to become a little distant and see him far less, like maybe even not at all (shhh best friend. No commentary on this one. I KNOW that you think I should kick him to the curb and walk away without looking back). I so appreciate what he does for me. I actually value it a lot. Sometimes it becomes daunting doing it alone and not having the support of another person. I take solace in knowing that he is there. Although, I guess it really isn’t fair to allow him to do that for me when I know that I have no intention of going forward with him. I need to be a better person and cut that tie. I have been fine for the last 10 years, there is no reason why I won’t be now. *sigh*

     I can’t lie, this dating adventure that I am on is not only fun, but a real eye opener. I like seeing what it is that I like in a person and I like knowing that now that I have made the conscious decision to meet my husband. the qualities that I want in a man are far different than before. I am excited to look back a year from now and see how the  the process unfolded. 🙂 

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Good Night husband where ever you are! I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you. Until then…

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